There are no fools like old ones; and so I found to my cost in the affair of Mrs. Cockspur and Mr. Herbert: after they had next day been more than two hours cooing and laying their nebs together like two young lily-white doves, he came back to me, without having done any thing to the purpose;—no doubt, he had partly warned me that such was likely to be the result of the visit; but I expected, when they met, it would have proved different. It was really provoking, after the trouble I had taken, and the clever manoeuvres which, with the help of Charles, I had so well performed, to see the swine driven through the marriage without rhyme or reason.

“I have had,” said he, when he returned—“I have had a satisfactory explanation with Mrs. Cockspur.”

“I’m rejoiced to hear it,” was my answer: “and have you fixed the day? and when is it to be?”

“Not so fast, Mr. Todd: to speak in your own style, aged persons must walk slowly; we both agreed, considering the objections of her family——”

“Dear me, Mr. Herbert,” cried I, almost in a pet with him, “what for did ye consider them at all? Ye ought to have done no such thing; but just after a couthy-crack about auld lang syne, and the well and the woe ye have met with, come to a catastrophe, and settled the day. But what have ye done?”

“And considering that we are ourselves both old——”

“Old! that's the very reason why the wedding should be soon; you have no time to lose.”

“Yes, Mr. Todd; and it is also the reason why it ought not to be at all. Since Heaven has been pleased to bring us together at a period when all pretence to passion on either side would be ridiculous, we can pass the brief remainder of our days in the reciprocities of friendship.”