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from Letters
Dear GCC,
Your Pick a Color essay in Vol. II No. 6 was a fine idea. My only objection is that “stylish and masculine” as it is, it doesn't go far enough. I'd like therefore to pass on an additional signal system. It works with band–aids worn in various places and coloured with laundry–marking pens. (These are not only cheaper than handkerchiefs but can be changed to suit the wearer's mood.)
Yellow, right knuckle: in closet at work, terrified of losing job
Yellow, left knuckle: out at work, terrified of never getting job
Yellow, across nose: has just lost job, plain terrified
Black, right knuckle: aspiring bank executive, &c., doesn't understand why America hates queers
Red, left knuckle: does understand why but is sick of explaining it to aspiring bank executives, &c.
Green, forehead: wants to be held and comforted non–sexually but would rather die than let anyone know
Green, chin: wants to hold and comfort another non–sexually but what sort of pervert would get off on something that ridiculous, anway?
Orange, earlobe: enjoys conversation but can have that with straights, so why go to a bar for it?
Orange, across mouth: likes conversation too, but feels shy and silly and wishes someone else would start it
White, nose: is afraid of getting old and ugly
Pink, chin: resents gay community's sexism
Gray, chin: resents gay community's consumption and classism
Brown, chin (white person): resents gay community's racism
None, chin (person of color): resents gay community's racism
Rainbow, across both eyes: wants to be “apolitical”
Is afraid of not being popular, feels lonely, knows he's really not good-looking, and secretly suspects his penis is too small: no band–aid necessary (condition assumed).
I realize the above is not exhaustive. I am afraid I cannot provide a lesbian code as the other lesbians I know seem never to have developed an efficient signal system and rely almost entirely on an archaic method of communication called “talking”. I hear they are also into something called “touching”. But such accounts are hardly credible, being neither modern, efficient, masculine, nor stylish.
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