I slouched inside a hoodie with my head on fire,
clutching an empty bottle of Diazepam
I couldn't look into their eyes
for fear their fearless power would be catching
‘I don't want to be like this’ I screamed
to which the nurse replied I didn't have to be
The security guard escorted me to the door
with a warning not to come back drunk
I slashed my wrist with a sliver of the window
thinking ‘now they'll see how sick I am’
The police arrived and took a statement
from the psychiatrist
‘Attention-Seeking Behaviour’ he explained;
‘Borderline Personality Disorder
Manipulative, Time-Waster, Not to be Trusted,
A history of abuse so she claims’
‘Well, we'll put her in handcuffs
and that will teach her not to do it again’
Selected by Femi Oyebode. From Stigma & Stones: Living with a Diagnosis of BPD, poems by Sally Fox & Jo McFarlane. © Jo McFarlane. Reprinted with permission.
Through their collection Stigma & Stones, writers/performers/partners Sally Fox and Jo McFarlane seek to promote understanding, improve treatment and reduce the stigma of living with a diagnosis of BPD.
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