Creationists believe that the Biblical account of the creation of the universe is literally true. God brought into existence the Earth and all its life forms in just six days. According to creationists, this event took place less than ten thousand years ago (they base their calculation of the age of the universe on the number of generations listed in the Bible).

Creationists have succeeded in persuading large swathes of the general public that their theory is at least as scientifically respectable as the Big Bang/evolution alternative. A recent Gallup poll indicated that about 45% of US citizens currently believe that God created human beings ‘pretty much in [their] present form at one time or another within the last 10,000 years’.

Two states, Arkansas and Louisiana, have even passed ‘balanced treatment’ laws requiring that creationism be taught alongside evolution in all state public schools. It was in Auburn, Alabama, shortly after that state required that a piece of paper be pasted into every biology school text book explaining why evolution is merely a ‘theory’ — and a highly questionable theory at that — that Richard Dawkins delivered the impromptu speech which forms the basis of the following.