This paper reports a study of the associations between social relations, language and cognition among people aged 85 or more years (hereafter the ‘oldest old’). Although the links between cognition and both social relations and language ability are well-established, less is known about the relationship between social relations and language skills, especially among the oldest old. With a sample of 20 adults aged 85–93 years living independently in two retirement communities (a seniors' apartment complex and independent apartments in a continuum-of-care setting), we used the approach of the Rochester Interaction Record to assess the frequency, purpose and quality of their social interactions over one week. It was hypothesised that aspects of social relations, as well as the type of residential setting, would associate with both cognitive skills (measured using the Composite Cognistat) and language skills (measured using the Boston Naming Test). It was found that participants who had a low proportion of interactions with family members, or a high proportion with friends, as well as those with diverse relationships, performed better on the cognitive and language tasks. Furthermore, those from the setting with more programmed activities performed better on the language task. The conclusion critically examines the findings about the influence of family relationships and the importance of residential setting.