I can't remember a time when I wasn't interested in social behaviour, and I chose a biology degree course where animal behaviour was a key component. Sussex University was an exciting place to be as an undergraduate in the early 1970s when sociobiology was coming to the fore, and I was lucky enough to have John Maynard Smith as my personal tutor. John's enthusiasm for applying evolutionary principles to animal behaviour was an inspiration that I still value today. When I started doing a PhD on moorhens Gallinula chloropus the working title for my thesis was ‘the function of winter flocking in moorhens’ – why animals live in groups was a key issue in the 1970s. It was whilst watching flocks that I noticed birds fighting in front of potential mates. Moorhens cannot be sexed in the field so it was not immediately clear whether it was males fighting for females or vice versa, and I can remember still my surprise and delight when I came back home and looked up the birds' numbers and sizes to discover that it was the smaller females fighting in front of males. It became clear that they were fighting for access to a particular male, and I started to wonder what it was about this male that was worth fighting for.