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What Girls Are Not Supposed to Know

Published online by Cambridge University Press:  12 January 2023

Eva Hoffmann
Affiliation:
University of Oregon
Alexis B. Smith
Affiliation:
Hanover College, Indiana
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Summary

Upstairs in the attic on the fifth floor lived a poor, young woman. She was entirely shapeless, and had a haggard, sunken face. Because her legs were swollen, she could not make it down the many floors to go to work.

Fräulein Helene secretly brought food up to her every day.

No one was allowed to know about it, because her parents would have scolded her and never permitted that she associate herself with “just anybody.”

When the delicate young girl climbed the stairs of poverty, carefully lifting her skirts so that they would not get dirty from the grime of the staircase, she felt confused by the complicated nature of life.

Somewhere everything was bright, white, beautiful, and somewhere else everything seemed gray, filthy, disgusting. If only my life remained sacred and beautiful, her soul wished.

This time, the young woman did not come to meet her. She sat on the edge of the bed. And although her poor, sorrowful face appeared to be entirely unmoved, two silent tears ran down her cheeks. Helene did not know what she felt. A lot of sympathy, perhaps, but also disgust. In spite of this, she said gently: “Dear woman, should I send for the doctor?”

“No, no, thank you, Fräulein.” And then she suddenly groaned, as though her body were being ripped apart. The neighbor came in the room. “Little Fräulein, go away from here! If your people were to find out.

“I will get help. Just go away quickly and do not come back again. Otherwise, we poor people will be chastised.”

“Should I get her husband? Where is her husband?”

“Husband? Ha! She doesn’t have one. Her fiancé ran away when she told him that a child was on the way.”

“A child?” Helene cried in shock, while a second, more powerful dread arose inside her. She felt as though she was about to faint in horror, but a feeling of disgust kept her upright. It seemed to her as though she was being pulled along into the swamp even though she only understood half of what was implied.

Her soul secretly begged her parents for forgiveness. Something like that must exist!

But the young woman groaned ever louder, while the old neighbor signaled that she should go away.

Type
Chapter
Information
Elsa Asenijeff’s Is that love? and Innocence
A Voice Reclaimed
, pp. 105 - 107
Publisher: Boydell & Brewer
Print publication year: 2022

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