Abstract

This chapter focuses on stories of women who sought refuge in Hong Kong after 1949. The first lived to 103 and passed away in Macau after living a solitary life, going through emotional turmoil and betrayal. She demonstrated toughness in holding an ethical attitude and lived a moral and loyal life towards her work and family. She gained respect and her life was praised as beautiful and graceful. The second story portrays a younger woman who died at the age of 34 of cancer. She was engaged in a long term triangular marital relationship, which was common in Hong Kong and China before concubinage was officially banned in 1971. Her generosity and caring attitudes towards folks and friends led to fond memories of her as a beautiful woman. Analysis of the dilemma of Confucian patriarchal values and the subjects’ autonomy in their attitudes in everyday living are brought into perspective.

Keywords: morality, ethics, aesthetic life, Hong Kong, Confucius

The Stories of Our Lives

The day will come when one finds that friends and folks are gone. Some have passed away, and some have moved to warmer climates or live near children and grandchildren. Those who cannot afford to move stay to live in buildings where there is support and food is served. An old, familiar story.

During such times, home care plays a crucial role in daily life. People are grateful to home caregivers, who take care of the aged and help sustain their sense of independence and well-being. We are all taught about independence in our lives, about being an individual person. Elana Buch claims that personhood is a fundamentally relational concept describing people's membership, roles, and status in societies. It is essential for the elderly to feel that sense of personhood, and they do so when they are engaged with vibrant moral communities surrounded by other elders, family members, kin, and care workers. Such social relations and moral communities offer possibilities for even frail, disabled, and home-bound older adults to live valued lives.

Each of us wants to be independent and balance that with social engagement. I agree that it is a central part of the meaning of successful aging. An aged person is praised when they have an active social life and look after their appearance.