For a pilot study that preceded the research reported in this book, Kazuko Behrens and I interviewed 40 mothers in Sapporo about their lives as mothers, wives, and workers. We asked the women a number of questions about their childhood experiences and their early relationships with their parents. We were intrigued with the possibility of exploring these issues but didn't know if they would be willing to divulge personal feelings about sensitive matters in a brief interview. To our surprise, these questions elicited long and often emotional responses, to the point that Kazuko began bringing tissues in case anyone started crying during the interview. Even as grown women, with children of their own, these mothers still experienced raw emotions about the way that they had been treated by their own parents and most did not hesitate to share them with us.

In addition to their candor and emotionality, we were also surprised by how negative and even bitter some of the women were about their early childhood experiences. Many women described their own mothers as frightening, strict, and controlling (see Holloway & Behrens, 2002).