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Letter XVIII

Published online by Cambridge University Press:  30 June 2022

Albert J. Rivero
Affiliation:
Marquette University, Wisconsin
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Summary

My dearest Lady,

My Mind is so wholly ingross’d by Thoughts of a very different Nature from those which the Diversions of the Town and Theatres inspire, that I beg to be dispens’d, for the present, from these lighter Subjects. But yet, if it please God to spare my Life, as your Ladyship does not disapprove of my Remarks, I intend to make a little Book, which I will present to your Ladyship, containing my poor Observations on all the Dramatick Entertainments I have seen, and shall see, this Winter; and, for this Purpose I have made brief Notes in the Margin of the printed Plays I have bought, as I saw them, with a Pencil, by referring to which, as Helps tomy Memory, I shall be able to give your Ladyship my Thoughts at the Time of seeing them, pretty nearly with the same Advantage as if I had written them at my Return from each.

I have obtained of Sir Simon, and Lady Darnford, the very great Pleasure of their Permission to Miss to stay with me, till it shall be seen how it will please God to deal with me; and I owe this Favour partly to a kind Letter written in my Behalf to Sir Simon, by Mr. B. and partly to Miss's earnest Request to her Papa, to oblige me; Sir Simon having made some Difficulty to comply, as Mr. Murray and his Bride have left them, and he says, he cannot live long, if he has not the Company of his beloved Daughter.

I cannot but say, I have many more Anxieties and Apprehensions, than perhaps I ought, on the approaching Occasion; but I was always a sad Coward, and too thoughtful a good deal: But I have so much to lose; such a dear, dear Gentleman to part with, if I must part with him; such generous Friends and Lovers, as I may say, of both Sexes: And then the Circumstance itself has so many Terrors to an apprehensive Mind, attending it, that I am out of Breath sometimes at the Thoughts of it, and want to run away from myself, if I could.—But it cannot be; and when I charge my Mind with the Reflections that Religion inspires, and ask myself, Who it was that gave me all these Blessings?

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Publisher: Cambridge University Press
Print publication year: 2012

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