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Extrapolation, 31:1, spring 1990

from Letters

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Summary

To the Editors:

Veronica Hollinger's essay in 30:2 [on “James Tiptree, Jr.”] (1989) sent me back to Alice Sheldon's letters. The relevant passage is from a letter dated the twenty-fifth of September, 1980, “0400 hours.”

Just been reading the Coming-Out stories ed by Stanley & Wolfe (with a lot of Adrienne Rich) and it occurred to me to wonder if I ever told you in so many words that I am a Lesbian – or at least as close as one can come to being one never having had a successful love with any of the women I've loved, and being now too old & ugly to dare try. Oh, had 65 years been different! I like some men a lot, but from the start, before I knew anything it was always girls and women who lit me up. (Oh, the sad, foolish, lovely tales I'm going to have to put down some day!)

I just thought I'd mention it, since you seem to have found yourself. (Possibly my reward for years of stasis & misery is to be the ideal confidante!)

Pre-Stonewall life was hard on homosexual people; our response to the hostility and bigotry around us has often been to associate love with death – or at least love with disaster, which is still a possibility today despite some of the advances of the last two decades. Unrequited love is a way of protecting oneself against the fear that the desire brings and yet expressing that desire. Hence the “stasis & misery.”

I'm sending the letters Tiptree wrote me to the Lesbian Herstory Archives in New York. The address is: Lesbian Herstory Archives, P.O. Box 1258, New York, N.Y. 10116.

Author's Note

“James Tiptree, Jr.” was a science fiction writer whose very fine work began appearing in the 1960s. No one had ever met “Tiptree” and theories about “him” were rife. Finally “James Tiptree, Jr.” was revealed to be a sixtyyear- old biologist called Alice Sheldon. We corresponded extensively, both before this revelation and afterwards. I loved James and was sad to lose him but I loved Alice too (she sent postcards typed in blue ink with blueink octopi drawn on them) and was much sadder to lose her because her loss (her death) was permanent.

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The Country You Have Never Seen
Essays and Reviews
, pp. 291 - 292
Publisher: Liverpool University Press
Print publication year: 2007

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