Dear Abbe,

I have a problem. I used to do time-resolved cryoTEM, but now I have ended up spending my days staring into the Abyss … a computer monitor. What can I do? How can I recover from EM withdrawal?

Chilled in Cincinnati

Dear Chilled,

Ach Mein Freund, I sympathize with you. Many a seasoned microscopist, eyes failing from decades staring into microscopes, find themselves in the same situation. However there is hope! Not only hope, but whatever fame and fortune eluded you during your career as a microscopist. I am referring here to computer games! We here at Abbe Labs have been busily turning micrographs and microanalytical datasets into exciting video games (ImageJ is much more flexible than people think). Soon, former microscopists such as yourself will get to relive their glory days questing across nanoscapes gathering images and datasets, as well as tokens to unlock secret microtools, treasure chests, and even grants. As the song says, “Everything old is new again.” Now you’ll have a use for those cabinets full of old TEM negatives, and funds to digitize them. Imagine playing endless games of “Electron Flight Simulator” over and over again, constantly varying the velocity of the electrons, composition of the material, or incident angle. A multi-user game in which teams compete over who can fix, section, stain, and image the tissue removed from a menacing alien creature (yes, of course, most players die at the hands of the alien or kill themselves with osmium). We have even adapted old knob sets from SEMs as controllers. Imagine all the profits we’ll reap once our subsidiary, Abbe Electronic Arts (AEA), unveils their new “Call of Data” on the Internet!

Don’t fall into a mid-career slump. Let Herr Abbe invigorate your entrepreneurial spirit. Send your beta versions for testing to Abbe’s faithful assistant at [email protected].